Giving the world a hand since February 3rd, 2002. "If you're gonna dine with them cannibals, sooner or later, darling, you're gonna get eaten."




Comments by YACCS

 
SO CRAZY, IT JUST MIGHT WORK...

A US woman has set up a website asking people to donate money to finance her divorce.

Well, if someone can have a website to beg for people to pay off her credit cards, then this should be a sure-fire winner!
so wrote Leper around about 5:37 PM

 
COULD SOMEONE PLEASE...

...tell me why this is a national news story? The regrettable incident occured in Indiana, so why the hell is it in the New York Times? Is there no other decent news in the world that they were forced to feed the child-hysteria that already exists after the media have driven the child abduction stories into the ground. To those at the NYT: please stop hitting that horse; it's dead already!
so wrote Leper around about 5:54 PM

 
JA "D'OH!"-L, FRAU DÄUBLER-GMELIN

Oh, those wacky Germans! Just when you think their election couldn't get any more nasty, you get this:

The regional newspaper Schwäbisches Tagblatt said today that Chancellor Gerhard Schröder's justice minister, Herta Däubler-Gmelin, had said: "Bush wants to divert attention from his domestic problems. It's a classic tactic. It's one that Hitler also used."

Oh, too bad! She was doing so well, right up until that Hitler remark. Isn't it funny how Germans are about that guy? Later on, she tried to explain her statement:

"I didn't compare the persons Bush and Hitler, but their methods."

Oh, bravo, Frau Däubler-Gmelin! Much better!

Even later:

Later tonight, she told ZDF television, "I just did not say that; it is as simple as that."

It must be really hard to backpedal in jackboots.

In his defence, Chancellor Gerhard Schröder issued a thinly-veiled statement of his own:

Mr. Schröder said tonight that he believed Ms. Däubler-Gmelin when she said she had not compared the two men. He added that anyone who compared Mr. Bush to a criminal would have no seat in his cabinet. He did not elaborate.

Translation: you'll shut the hell up if you you want to keep your cushy government job!

Even later, proving that Germans have their own versions of Republicans called "Christian Democrats", we get this statement from Friedbert Pflüger:

"This is what happens when the government allows the moral coordinates to deteriorate so far."

Further down in the article, we find this curious statement:

Mr. Schröder has said Germany will not take part in any attack on Iraq, whatever the United Nations decides. His stand has appealed to broad stretches of a postwar German population bred to abhor war, but it has also brought charges of "German unilateralism" and estrangement from its principal allies in the United States and Europe. [emphasis added]

"German unilateralism"? The last time that phrase was uttered, Germany was annexing the Sudetenland.

Isn't it nice to know that German elections are as little about issues as are ours?
so wrote Leper around about 10:54 PM

 
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

This is a story that made Coke squirt out my nose (Vanilla Coke, not the powder).

[note: LOR is a Letter of Reprimand]
so wrote Leper around about 2:18 PM

 
'SCUSE ME WHILE I WHIP THIS OUT...

Have you seen the Masterbate for Peace site?

What? You haven't? Don't you love world peace?

This is a serious website, hoping to replace all thoughts of violence with (self-)love. The best part are the signed petitions:

I never knew how a simple tug could do so much. I am now planning on masturbating twice daily in this time of need. When we work for peace, we need to think of the children. Except when we're masturbating, cause that's just gross.

There's even a "Masturbate for Peace Haiku" section. Talk about self-indulgent!

Folks, you can't make up comedy like this!
so wrote Leper around about 12:16 AM

 
CANDY-GRAM FOR MONGO!

Like the preacher in "Blazing Saddles" to Sheriff Bart, the rest of the Arab world has told Saddam Hussein "Son, you're on your own." Needless to say, the Dubya administration (and most Americans) are skeptical of Saddam's pledge of unconditional & unrestrained U.N. arms inspectors.

It's also interesting to note that the Saudis have said that they will have to honor any resolution passed on Iraq, which potentially means allowing the U.S. to use their bases to stage airstrikes should Saddam reneg on his pledge. Other countries seem to be in support of a tough U.N. resolution. After 50+ years of inneffectual leadership, could this be a renewal of purpose for the U.N.?

Dubya is still an idiot, though...a very lucky idiot, but an idiot nonetheless...

UPDATE: Steven Den Beste has the lowdown on how the Iraqi offer is much less than it seems.
so wrote Leper around about 11:45 PM

 
IS THE UNITED STATES...

A republic

or

A democracy?
so wrote Leper around about 3:27 PM