Giving the world a hand since February 3rd, 2002. "If you're gonna dine with them cannibals, sooner or later, darling, you're gonna get eaten."




Comments by YACCS

 
DUDE, WHERE'S MY CAR?

My car is currently buried up to the trunk in a snowdrift.

It's parked in the street.

I hate winter.
so wrote Leper around about 1:24 PM

 
THUMBS DOWN

Short entry tonight. Got a very deep papercut (actually cardboard cut) across the pad of my right middle finger. Hard to type.

Saw the movie "Daredevil" tonight at a special screening. Not good. In fact, pretty bad. Story was rushed, acting was bad (Ben Afleck as a superhero? Aw, c'mon!), love interest was very rushed. I felt like the director made a decent movie, and then edited out about a half hour of footage, just for the hell of it. And don't get me started about the music. Every scene had a different song from the "soundtrack" album--none of which fit the action at all--obviously placed simply to sell CDs.

This reviewer would've been pissed had he not had a free ticket. It's not even matinee material. Think more along the lines of free-HBO-weekend-movie, and you're close to how bad this movie actually was.

In it's defense, the special effects were really good, as was the fight choreography, but flashy images & butt-kicking only go so far. Just ask Sylvester Stallone.

In short, don't see this movie. Stay home and do anything--clean your tub, wash the dog, watch the Weather Channel--but don't go to the theater for this stinkburger.
so wrote Leper around about 10:37 PM

 
ET TU, BRUTE?

Over the course of the last year or so, I've met several wonderful women that, for one reason or another, were completely undateable by anyone of quality. Despite the various reasons behind their undateablilty, they all had one thing in common, a shared attitude. Not one of pompousity, or aloofness, but of quiet inferiority.

Put simply, whenever anyone of quality showed an interest in them, they all thought to themselves "If he's interested in me, then there must be something really wrong with him. In what way is he broken?"

To me, this is a terrible tragedy.

What caused these women to so doubt their own self-worth so as to think that only wrong/crazy/bad men would be interested in what they would have to offer in a relationship? It made me want to find the person responsible for hurting them so deeply and whack them over the head with a shovel. Repeatedly.

And then just recently I got an even bigger shock.

I found myself thinking in exactly the same way.

"What would a woman that looks like that see in a guy like me?" I said to myself. When the realization of what I had thought struck me, a cold shiver went down my spine. Is my self-image that poor? Who in my past had beaten me so severely with the emotional 2x4 that I am doubting my own self-worth?

What I came up with was that, for me, it wasn't the fault of any one person, although a few did have big roles to play. I guess that it all comes down to when someone has suffered a big emotional shock to the system, they have a choice: go completely numb or to feel pain/loneliness. Going numb ends the hurt, but it also turns one into a robot, not truly alive, a simulacrum only going through the motions of life. The other option is to latch onto that pain. After awhile, the pain becomes something like an old friend, missed when absent, because even though the pain hurts, at least it lets you know that you can still feel something. I guess that I had still been carrying around a bit of that old pain, like a comfy pair of broken-in shoes, afraid to get rid of them for something different.

I think it's past time for a new emotional wardrobe.
so wrote Leper around about 11:05 PM

 
"ZAPRUDERED"

She knows, now, absolutely, hearing the white noise that is London, that Damien's theory of jet lag is correct: that her mortal soul is leagues behind her, being reeled in on some ghostly umbilical down the vanished wake of the plane that brought her here, hundreds of thousands of feet above the Atlantic. Souls can't move that quickly, and are left behind, and must be awaited, upon arrival, like lost luggage.

I just started WIlliam Gibson's Pattern Recognition.

Now, when I like a book, I tend to race through it. When I really like a book, I tend to slowly, methodically, painstakingly crawl my way through it, squeezing out every last mote of enjoyment on the first reading.

I'm currently on page 24. It took me almost 90 minutes to get that far.

I really, really, really like this book.

To curl fetal there, and briefly marvel, as a final wave crashes over her, at the perfect and now perfectly revealed extent of her present loneliness.

Wow.
so wrote Leper around about 9:31 PM

 
I'M THE WORST PERSON IN THE WORLD...

...when it comes to figuring out if someone is interested in me. I have an eagle eye when it's for other people, but when I'm personally involved, it's like a fog descends, blinding me to the intentions of others. The only part of me unaffected is my subconscious, but that takes hours, days, weeks, or longer to get through to my conscious mind. The merest hint of interest is all it takes to reduce my IQ by 150 points.

Why am I posting about this? One of my very attractive female co-workers made a certain comment. It could have been a merely-playful-slightly-risque phrase, maybe even innocent flirting.....or was it more? I DON'T KNOW!

Now, granted, I'm a big, dumb male, so I don't take hints very well, but this is so bad that the only way that I would be able to figure out who likes me is for that person to verbally club me over the head & drag me back to their cave by my hair. God only knows how many opportunities I've missed because of this failing.

If this were happening to another person, I could read her intentions like an old "TV Guide". Why am I so frickin' clueless?
so wrote Leper around about 5:08 PM

 
WOO-HOO!

NY Rangers reaquire Alexei Kovalev! Next season's looking better and better!
so wrote Leper around about 5:02 PM

 
"THUNDERBIRDS ARE GO!"

Put a better antenna on my tv (no, I don't have cable), and found a broadcast station that plays the cable network Tech TV 24/7. Currently watching those loveable marionettes "The Thunderbirds". Yeah, it's odd, but I'm not complaining.

It beats the hell out of "Oprah".
so wrote Leper around about 4:58 PM