Leper Messiah

Giving the world a hand since February 3rd, 2002. "If you're gonna dine with them cannibals, sooner or later, darling, you're gonna get eaten."

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Friday, January 23, 2004

Anyone got any (constructive) ideas for baby names? Here's what I've got so far:

Boy: Riley, Austin, Xander

Girl: Holly

Anyone else wanna offer one up? No guarantee we'll use it, but if we do, you'll have the warm, fuzzy glow of knowing that someone out there in this cold, cruel world thinks one of your suggestions is a good one.

UPDATE (1/27): The leaders so far...

Boy: Riley
Girl: Kira

I think I lost the fight for Holly...damn. We both really like Riley, and Kira is growing on me. My concern now is how I am going to explain to our child (if it's a boy) that he was named after a character on Buffy the Vampire Slayer...


The Rangers have traded with the Caps: Jaromir Jagr for Anson Carter.


Yeah, that's exactly what this team needs. Another prima donna winger.

Oh, they also picked up Jamie Pushor from Columbus for an 8th round draft pick & a bag of pucks. Can you feel the love, Jamie?

Tuesday, January 20, 2004

Fast Food Nation, by Eric Schlosser, page 73:
"Pete Meersman, the President of the Colorado Restaurant Association, advocates creating a federal guest worker program to import low-wage foodservice workers from overseas."
Isn't that what Dubya did a couple weeks ago? Didn't he want to import immigrant workers to "do the jobs that Americans don't want to do"?

Gee, do you think our Republican president had ulterior motives in his proposal?


Well, for those of you that haven't heard, I'm going to be a dad.

No, the other three Horsemen of the Apocalypse aren't knocking at the door. Hell hasn't had a record snowfall. Those aren't pigs you see flying past your window.

Remember: the Pill is only 99% effective. Don't be that 1%, and end up explaining to your child that they were the result of a statistical fluke. "Mommy and Daddy love you very much, but we didn't want you..."

How's this for irony: January 13th was R & my 9 month anniversary. Someone sure has a sense of humor.

So here's how I found out. Quite an amusing story, actually:
We had gone to the doctor Friday afternoon, as R had been throwing up for over two weeks. We thought it was the flu that had been going around. Anyway, she goes in to see the doc, and I sit in the waiting room, reading. After almost two hours, the nurse calls me back, tells me that they are going to wheel R over to the emergency room to give her an IV or two, owing to the fact that she was severely dehydrated.

So we get over to the ER, get placed into our little cubicle, and the nurse starts going over her info, making sure that everything is accurate. I had only been half paying attention when I heard "....and I see that you're about ten weeks along now..."


The book in my hands hit the floor, my jaw dropped, and apparently my eyebrows ended up somewhere around my hairline. "Um, honey, by the way, I'm pregnant," she said with an apologetic smile.

My first thought: HOLY SHIT!
My second thought: I'm gonna be a dad? Cool!
My third thought: I'm gonna have to get a better job.

"Oh, he didn't know...?"
"No, I didn't have a chance to tell him."

After about a minute or so, the room started to get really hot. I tried to take off my coat, and succeeded in doing so, ripping one of the sleeves in the process. I didn't pass out, but that was one of my options.

Later on, the nurse came back and apologized to me, which was very nice of him. He thought that I already knew. I told him that it was ok, and that I would have had the same reaction no matter who told me the news.
The idea has had a few days to start to sink in, and I see some very interesting things happening already. How and when did I get paternal instincts? Why does she suddenly have cravings for different foods? Why does everyone tell me to start buying diapers now?

We told the soon-to-be grandparents on Saturday. My Dad, although not thrilled with the idea, was at least accepting, even if he did try to give me the "do-the-right-thing" speech. [Why did he even think I'd do otherwise? Did he think I'd bolt? I'm vaguely offended by that.] My brother & sister were pretty cool about the whole thing. My sister was actually pretty psyched. "Someone's gotta do it!" she said to me, referring to providing our parents with grandkids. I didn't get to tell my Mom until later that night. After the initial shock (and the resulting seven seconds of dead silence after breaking the news), she was "tickled" as well.

R's mother was suprisingly cool with the news as well. I thought for sure she'd at the least be mad at me! I'm still not looking forward to the next time I see her face-to-face.

I find myself with a lot of different emotions. The main one is still shock. That'll eventually wear off. After that is terror of the unknowns to come. Perfectly normal. I'm vaguely happy. I'm also sad--I was hoping that R & I would get a few years of "us" time before we had children. Our lifestyles will completely change. Her cat won't be the "baby" of the house anymore, which will piss her off (and you don't want to be on the bad side of this cat).

I'm also excited. For years now, every time I'd see my friends from high school, I'd see their spouses and growing families and I'd feel jealous. After Eric's wedding, even my mother noticed how much it bothered me. Now I get to have a family of my own.

Most of all, I feel a whole lotta love for R. Just when I thought I couldn't love her any more...I guess it's a good thing that I had already decided that she was the one I was going to keep.

They say that you're never ready to have kids, and that there is never a good time to have them. Maybe so, but this kid has got to have the worst timing of all. Those of you familiar with the current situation will surely agree.

Well, now that there's nothing I can do about it, I may as well enjoy the ride.