Giving the world a hand since February 3rd, 2002. "If you're gonna dine with them cannibals, sooner or later, darling, you're gonna get eaten."




Comments by YACCS

 
A BRILLIANT FAILURE

Finally saw Revenge of the Sith. A good movie, as long as you look at the pretty pictures and don't try to think about what is going on.

First, we went to the new theater in town. The one that has a Starbucks in it. I could've had cheesecake. At a movie. They also sold kettle corn, hot dogs, ice cream, nachos, pretzel bites, and cookies, in addition to the usual movie fare. We spent more on food than on tickets.

Speaking of tickets, Iowa now has a theater where you can buy your tickets online. About time. Not a perfect system, as you have to print out a page with a barcode on it (unlike in D.C. where you use your credit card to pick up your tickets at an automated kiosk), but much better than standing in line.

The special effects and action are AWESOME. The opening action scene and the lightsaber fight between Anakin & Obi-wan are worth the price of admission alone. I was, however, disappointed with the seeming ease of the defeats of both Count Dooku and General Grevious. I'd have thought that those would be a little more....challenging. I guess Lucas didn't want to make the movie any longer than he had to.

Speaking of Lucas, whatever directorial magic he had when shooting American Graffitti or the first Star Wars is totally gone now. All of the dialogue--ALL of it--was wooden and awkward. This was especially true of the scenes with Anakin & Padme. Hayden Christiansen and Natalie Portman are fine actors, but what is it about them that the suck the life out of each other whenever thay are on screen together? I was physically cringing every time they talked. Was that Lucas' directing? Or his script?

There were also little things that bugged me so much. This happened all throught the movie. At the end, would Obi-wan really have stood around & lectured Anakin--after having cut off his legs & left arm--and then watch as his padawan & friend burst into flame? Is that the compassionate Jedi Master we've come to know after 28 years and six movies? Would Yoda really have given up so easily during his fight with the Emperor? "Oh, well, I tried. Time to go into hiding!" Remember his "Do or do not. There is no try" statement to Luke? And why doesn't Vader remember ever owning those droids? Didn't he recognize C3PO at Bespin? He build the damn thing! Why wipe the memory of C3PO only? Why not R2D2? Why did Mace Windu bring along three other Jedi, when all they did was become speedbumps between him and the Emperor? I'd have thought that Jedi would've lasted longer than three seconds apiece.

Anakin's agonizing at slipping under the influence of the Dark Side also were kinda weak. "I feel bad about killing him/killing them/doing that, but I want more power to save my wife, so it's ok." He shakes things off waaaay too easily. Also, about 2/3 the way through the movie, he changes from loving husband to creepy-ex-that-you-have-the-restraining-order-against guy. "I'm doing this all for you, so we can rule the galaxy together and you won't die." Feh.

Lucas' clumsy attempt to link the history of the Republic to what is happening in Real Life was also so ham-fisted that it interfered with my viewing pleasure. His plot was the equivalent of having an obnoxious fanboy sitting next to you, nudging you with his elbow & pointing at the screen, whispering too loudly into your ear with his overwhelming halitosis breath, saying "See? See the parallels with our current political crisis? Isn't Star Wars relevant? This is truly a modern-day Illiad!"

In the end, if you go into this looking for a movie of deep meaning and significance, you'll be terribly disappointed. If, however, you treat this like the visual brain candy that it really is, you'll be happy. The movie fails on its attempted deeper level, but on such a grandiose scale that you can't help but marvel at the balls it took to mount such an undertaking. That, coupled with the jaw-dropping action & special effects, make this a pretty decent movie. Better than Phantom Menace or Attack of the Clones, to be sure.

In short: watch, don't think, and you'll like it.
so wrote Leper around about 6:11 AM

 
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MEEEEEE....

So, yeah, I'm 34 today.

Not sure how I feel about that.
so wrote Leper around about 3:19 AM